The previous Great NEWS post started 2014 with New Year, New You Part 3: Spirit Support and today is Part 4: Relationship Resilience.  Have you started a New Year with great intentions for transforming some area of your life and let yourself down when your New Year’s resolutions ran into roadblocks? We all have. Are you ready for new strategies and suggestions to maximize your potential now for success this year?  Welcome to Great NEWS in 2014 with New Year, New You Part 4: Relationship Resilience. 

Relationship Resilience is another key area to focus on to enjoy a caring, loving and rewarding life.  Using the first 8 weeks of 2014 to learn and maximize the 8 key areas in your wheel of life increases your probability for satisfaction and success.  These create a synergistic compounding effect for enjoying even more happiness and health this year.  Proven principles work when you do your part.   This post summarizes simple steps for accessing more of your personal power for more effective and efficient ways to update and upgrade your relationships.

Happy Man and Woman

Magic moments occur when you create relationship resilience that can weather the savage storms, shifting sands and stormy seas.

Committing to 8 weeks of progress will create new behaviors, beliefs and habits for peak performance. Focusing your energy and intentions on one new area each week will help you feel more fulfilled and successful knowing you are being more balanced and empowered.  Relationship mastery is a key skill for peak performance and stellar success.

These posts are designed like a treasure map that offers clever clues, hidden hints, informative insights and subtle suggestions to help you find hidden treasures to increase your level of health and wealth.  Every day we face important decisions and discoveries that determine our destiny.  Your relationship with yourself and others will determine if you move closer towards or further away from your dram destiny.

Magic moments occur when you create relationship resilience that can weather the savage storms, shifting sands and stormy seas.

Your identity and values regarding relationship mastery impacts every area of your emotional, mental, physical and spiritual mastery.  Learning the art and science of relationships will determine your level of stress or success.  When we realize we can update and upgrade our relationship hardware, operating system and software a paradigm shift can occur.  When you stop wasting your time retelling your sad stories and start investing your time on building strong skills you magnify your relationship resilience.

After years of dealing with difficult detours, running into roadblocks and being shaken by speed bumps in my relationships an epiphany occurred.  There is “one thing” in our life right now that is blocking our energy, happiness and joy and it can be resolved with a definitive decision and a massive action plan.  Resolving this “one thing” will make the biggest difference in transforming our life and relationships to the next level.

Relationship Resilience

This post contains simple suggestions for relationship resilience.  When we experience relationship pain it could be a sign we are not focusing on our relationships enough.  What if our relationship pains were wake up calls to start focusing on ways to enhance our relationship pleasures and possibilities?  The quality of our life is a direct reflection of the quality of our relationship with our self and others. Most people are challenged in dealing with both. Magic moments occur when you learn relationship mastery. To be happy, healthy and in harmony we must have great relationship resilience.

Waterfall Couple

Relationships magnify the human experience on earth.

Our relationship beliefs, choices and decisions determine how we treat our self and others each day so choose wisely.  Your relationship behaviors and habits will either help you be happy, healthy and in harmony or hurt you to the point of being sad, sick and stressed.  Relationships magnify the human experience on earth.  Unfortunately few people think enough about how their everyday actions and choices will either maintain their relationship resilience or cause relationship ruins.

Your relationships can create magic moments each day when you do your part with reaffirming, refreshing, rejuvenating and replenishing rituals.  Many people tend to take their relationships for granted most of the time.  Then they wonder why their relationships may reject or resist them instead of responding to their needs.  People often seem to have a better connection to their replaceable cell phone than their relationships.   People can waste hours with people they barely know yet fall out of touch with their real relationships due to neglect.  When we learn the benefits of revitalizing our relationship resilience we open the doors to manifesting raving relationships.

When people get bogged down with relationship issues it can easily snow ball out of control into every other area of their life.  This can cause a chain reaction crash that starts a downward spiral in the quality of life.  Our everyday behaviors and beliefs towards our relationships have a direct bearing on our level of persistent problems or peak performance and sustainable success.

So how do we resolve our relationship jams, roadblocks and wrecks? Maybe we start by focusing and fixing ourselves instead of the other person.   When we realize the other person is fine and unique just the way they are we can release the desire to change or fix them.  When we focus more on making deposits into their relationship bank accounts we learn life is more about giving than getting.   When we give unconditionally we are free from bartering, keeping score and materialism which allow abundance, grace and joy to fulfill our life.

Stop Relationship Ruins

  • Alone

    Ignore negative people that are critical and not supportive of you. Real relationships are based on mutual admiration and respect.

    Avoid toxic relationships that drain your energy, spirit and well being.

  • Ignore negative people that are critical and not supportive of you. Real relationships are based on mutual admiration and respect. 
  • Avoid gossiping, greed and guilt trips. Stop robbing your relationships of loyalty and trust.  Avoid complicated triangles and talk directly to the people in your circles.
  • Stop giving conditional love.  Conditional love means if they do something first then I will accept, appreciate and love them.      
  • Stop using gifts, money and toys as a relationship bargaining tool.  Many divorced parents and even grandparents use gifts and things as a means of buying love and manipulating children.  This is not conducive to being happy and healthy for either party.
  • It is well known that abusive and addictive alcohol, drugs, gambling, pornography, shopping and violence have harmful consequences on your relationships.  They rob relationships of the ability to be happy, healthy and loving.    
  • Sarcasm, snide comments, stress and struggles cause our relationships to wither and die.
  • Envy, greed, jealousy and lust are damaging emotions which rob our relationships and hurt our emotional, mental and physical happiness and health.
  • When we lose our compassion, generosity and kindness in our relationships with our family, friends and fellow human beings we doom them to fail.
  • Stop creating artificial, harmful and phony relationships.  
  • Determine which relationships are subtracting joy and value. Delete the ones that are draining your energy and time and find new ones to add even more joy and value.
  • Avoid critical, harmful or negative comments with family and especially at meal times.  Many children link these stresses to food and meals and become emotional eaters.

Start Relationship Rescue

  • Playing Boys

    Relationships can be our deepest pain or greatest pleasure depending on the energy and time we invest in them. Enjoy quality time with the people that matter most.

    Relationships can be our deepest pain or greatest pleasure depending on the energy and time we invest in them. Enjoy quality time with the people that matter most.   

  • Walk and talk while you reconnect and restore the emotional, mental and physical body.    
  • Invest the energy and time to help them feel safe, soothed and supported.
  • Learn to laugh, learn and love while doing more fun things together. 
  • Find ways to communicate and cooperate more effectively and efficiently. 
  • Do your part to create a sustainable lifestyle where you reduce, reuse, recycle, renew, repair and repurpose items in order to protect and respect the ecology, ecosystem and environment.  The help of each  one of us helps all of us.
  • Support your family, friends and even strangers with a kind word and warm smile.  We all need to feel accepted, acknowledged and appreciated. 
  • Your family and friends are doing the best they can with the resources they currently have available to them.  Help them and yourself find new and empowering resources to expand their choices and opportunities. 
  • Treat those you have a relationship with the way you wish for them to treat you.   Many people tend to treat their family with less kindness and respect than they would a friend or stranger.   
  • You and your close relationships only have one body, mind and spirit so make great choices to take great care of yourself and them at the same time.    
  • Accept and unconditionally love your self and your relationships.  Each of you is an amazing gift from God and just perfect the way you are right now. 
  • Relationships are like planting flower seeds which will only survive if you nurture, water and weed the garden.   Enjoy reinvigorating, rejuvenating and revitalizing your relationships so they become even more resilient and renewed.    
  • Learn to feel blessed and grateful for all the amazing relationships in your life.  Whether they are short, medium or long term they can guide and serve you well when you accept the message and the messenger. 
  • Learn to appreciate and focus on the special blessings, gifts, insights, talents and values of the people in your various relationships and to suppress your critical side.  
  • Some of the best gifts you can give your relationships are affection, appreciation and attention.  Quality time is a rare and valued gift.  Even a simple greeting such as: I appreciate you, I respect you or thank you for being in my life can renew their spirit and uplift their day.
  • It is important to have family meals together as often as possible.  Be sure to encourage a peaceful , pleasant and relaxing atmosphere.  Focus on cheerful conversation and avoid any distractions in the background like TV or radio.  Saving a family blessing or prayer together before meals is a great ritual to maintain.
  • Focus each day on gratitude, joy and love for the fantastic family and friends in your life.

Build Relationship Resilience  

  • Coffee and Friends

    Quality relationships are designed to be direct, honest, open, safe and supportive. Our relationship resilience grows stronger by doing small things to reinforce them consistently.

    Commit to a daily schedule of expanding and improving your relationships.  Avoid being to busy to support your important relationships.  We must build our relationship resilience to deal with the adversity that will come to us. 

  • Quality relationships are designed to be direct, honest, open, safe and supportive.  Our relationship resilience grows stronger by doing small things to reinforce them consistently.   
  • Learn to develop habits and routines that build appreciation, awareness, bonuses, kindness, praise, recognition, respect, reward, surprises and thoughtfulness for the relationships in your life.
  • Celebrating, master minding and meeting with like minded family, friends and fans is a great way to magnify the benefits of your relationships.   
  • Identify a master mind peer group and role models that elevate your level of expectations, experience and exposure for success to the next level.   
  • Going on adventures, cruises, seminars, retreats, travels, treks, trips, and vacations with your centers of influence and circles of relationships is a great way to build better bonds and mutual benefits.  Traveling to fun, exciting, historic and special places is a great way to renew and reenergize your relationships. 
  • Investing the time to review and update your values and vision is valuable.  Sharing these with your relationship circles ensures your standards, strategies and systems will be spelled out.  When you set clear expectations and guidelines it helps you communicate your code of conduct and rules more clearly.  Consider sharing your Vision Board with your top relationship circles for accountability and awareness.    
  • Quality relationships increase your chances for being happier and healthier every day.
  • When you consistently breathe, eat, live and pray for relationship resilience you create a very strong foundation for all the other areas of your life.  This will help maintain your energy, health and well being.

This checklist is designed to help you move towards an extraordinary happy, healthy and in harmony lifestyle and away from the standard sad, sick and stressed lifestyle. Implementing these strategies and suggestions will help you experience more magic moments and relationship resilience.

This Great NEWS post shared the New Year, New You Part 4: Relationship Resilience.  Simple steps and smart suggestions will help renew your relationships.  We control our destiny by the decisions we make each day…so choose wisely for peak performance versus persistent problems.  This Part 4: Relationship Resilience post is shared to help you enjoy even more fulfillment, joy and love in your relationships.

What is your current Gap?

How well are you reinforcing your relationships?

Mastery Action Plan (MAP)

What mastery action plans will help you develop and discover more relationship resilience?   What decisions have helped you? The books The Dance of Anger and The Dance of Intimacy by Harriett Lerner Ph.D. are extremely informative and insightful regarding the influence of our relationships and our level of happiness and health.

Call to Action

What comments, commitments or concerns do you have for creating raving relationships?

Next week the Great NEWS blog will share:

New Year, New You Part 5: Education Empowerment