The previous Great NEWS post shared ten simple steps to Stop That and Start This Part 1 and this week we continue with Part 2 simple success strategies 11 – 21. As you know many of our dis-empowering behaviors and limiting beliefs began with early childhood conditioning. This makes it imperative for us to focus on updating and upgrading our mental software with empowering actions, education and thoughts. When we stop the negative programming and start using positive programming we help ourselves, our children and future generations.
An area of significant concern is noticing what is happening to our children which are the next generation of leaders, teachers and workers. Children and students today are dealing with bullying, negativity, pressure, stress and tension on an unprecedented level. When you hear of children feeling helpless, hopeless and hostile towards the parents, people and politicians you begin to feel something is not right in the world. Children born into a world of abuse, anger, debt, desperation, environmental destruction, hunger, pollution and war are missing an important part of the joys in childhood.
Unhappy and unhealthy toddlers, children and teens are a clear sign that the adults have allowed conditions to deteriorate below an acceptable level. Our natural tendency is be happy, healthy and in harmony with each other, our family and our surroundings. When you see so many troubling signs of extreme hunger, poverty and starvation in undeveloped countries versus the levels of undernourished, obese and wastefulness in developed countries you realize how out of balance things have become.
We know that faith, hope, joy and love are essential for being happy, healthy and in harmony. Many people today feel that the quality of life has declined in recent decades. Many people feel things have become worse due to destruction of the environment, disagreements, disasters and dishonest policies. When the wealth concentrated and controlled by the top 1% is more than that of the bottom 50% and the rest of the 99% are feeling more sadness, sickness and stress then change is inevitable.
What can we do to improve the quality of life for our children and ourselves? The following list of 21 simple success strategies will help us be more happy, healthy and in harmony. By letting go of the things that have caused us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering we create a vacuum ready to be filled with great energy, emotions and experiences. When we stop the disabling behaviors and thoughts and start the enabling behaviors and thoughts a paradigm shift will occur that allows us to step up to the next level in our life.
21 Simple Success Suggestions
1. Face Your Fears and Live Your Dreams
2. Replace Negative Self Talk with Positive Self Talk
3. Live Your Life and Let Others Live Theirs
4. Instead of Impressing People…Start Identifying with People
5. Replace Criticism with Constructive Feedback
6. Turn Limiting Beliefs into Unlimited Power Beliefs
7. Stop Complaining and Start Complimenting
8. Replace a Desire To Be Right with a Desire to Be Connected
9. Instead of Labeling Things…Be Open to All Possibilities.
10. Resisting Change is Stressful so Start Embracing Progress
11. Replace Rationalizations with Taking Responsibility
Rather than wasting energy and time on making excuses and rationalizing things imagine the feeling of freedom that comes with accepting responsibility for your actions. Everything you do or do not do has a direct influence on your life. Responsibility puts you at the helm of your life’s journey versus being a victim of circumstances. Why waste time with excuses that hold you back when you can be responsible and move forward. Personal development and self growth accelerates and you progress when you replace excuses with acknowledgement and accept personal responsibility.
12. Let Go Your Need for Control and Accept Things as They Are
Control is an illusion created by our ego to feel more influential, important and powerful. Wanting to be in control requires a lot of energy and time and creates a lot of strain and stress in our everyday lives. By letting go an obsession to control what happens around you, you allow things to evolve. Allow others and things to be and evolve as they are naturally meant to be and watch how much better you feel. It is obviously acceptable to influence your children or the outcome of a process or project when it contributes to the greater good. Be sure to remind yourself we are only human and can really control very few things other than ourselves. Even that may be an illusion.
13. Avoid Blaming and Start Accepting Things as They Are
Letting go your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel is very liberating. When you accept tings as they are you stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life. We have all been blessed with an amazing body, mind and spirit to create our lives into any masterpiece of our choosing. Rather than blaming others for the past and being stuck there allow yourself the gift of the present to be the person you want to be in spite of what may have happened in the past. When you stop telling the sad stories and start telling smart stories where you learned a valuable life lesson you will experience a terrific transformation..
14. Learn from the Past and Live in the Present
At times it appears that things may have been better in the past and in fact they may have been. However the past has pasted and we are now in the present so why not enjoy the present which will soon become the past? Right now the present moment is all we have to be with and everything else is past or future so why not enjoy the present moment to the fullest. When you are present with another person or even yourself you have the opportunity to experience bliss and joy right here and right now. We all have heard that “life is a journey not a destination” so enjoy the trip one moment at a time. It is important to have a compelling future, mastery action plan and vision for the future as long as you stay present with the here and now.
15. Practice the Art of Detachment
Rather than holding on too tight and being fearful or obsessive imagine the relief from letting go and knowing that there is enough and things are as they were meant to be. Attachment to people, possessions and things can consume a lot of our energy. As you learn the art of detachment you actually come to appreciate things even more. Attachment is often linked to control, greed and power while detachment is associated with acceptance, appreciation and love. As you learn to appreciate everything in the present and know that the universe is abundant you will find total peace and tranquility. According to the ancient Sufi’s this is the state of bliss.
16. Focus on What is Most Important In Life
Many people like to major in minor things. When we focus on what is really most important in our lives we experience happiness, joy and serenity in our life. Have you heard the pearl of wisdom that says “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…It is All Small Stuff”? There is a lot of insight in this powerful phrase.
17. Parenting is a Profession and Requires Training
Some people have children and believe they can be good parents because of the childbirth and learning as they go. Parenting can be very stressful and is one of the most important responsibilities and roles one can accept. It is a complicated, demanding and a long term role that requires commitment, dedication, love and persistence. We are not born with all the skill sets necessary to be a great parent therefore it is imperative to seek coaching, education and training in order to be the best parent you can be. We owe it to our children to continually be growing and learning to be better adults and parents with books, classes, programs and role models to guide us on the path to being great parents.
18. Shift from Talking to Communicating
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) research indicates that words are 7%, voice quality is 38% and body language is 55% of the communications process. Early in life we are encouraged and even pushed to begin talking to communicate. This may be why there are so many stressors regarding communications and why there are so many misunderstandings when we talk to each other. What if instead of just talking we focused more on full connecting with and observing the other persons body language and tuned into their tonality to understand the full message they want to deliver? Like any skill in life real communications requires practice and training to master both the art and science for mastery level communications.
19. Go Beyond Hearing to Focused Listening
How many times has someone said to you in a frustrated tone that you are not listening to them? You know that you were listening but did not understand or tuned the message out. Many times this is a result of different communication styles.
20. Replace Punishment with Discipline
The various ideas regarding the use of punishment have become one of the biggest challenges the world faces. Many people have been raised to feel that when you do something “dangerous, hurtful or wrong” you should be punished to teach you a lesson. The challenge with this line of thinking is the judgmental aspect of what are “right” or “wrong” as well as the person’s age, circumstances, situation and timing of the incidence. Punishment causes a lot of hurt and anger which often leads to more inappropriate behavior which starts a vicious cycle. While an entire book could be written on this topic the idea of punishing someone with pain to learn a lesson teaches people to expect pain when they make a mistake, the fear of being truthful and that those with authority will hurt or punish in order to help you be better in the future. Maybe it is time to use more compassion and discipline to help people learn from their life lessons and poor judgment. We all make choices and decisions that are not the optimal choice and that is how we learn to make better choices in the future. Discipline is the ability to analyze your options, make a decision for the best choice and then take action on that decision. Pain and punishment from an authority figure are much less effective than empowerment, honesty, incentives, integrity and rewards which are great ways to motivate and reinforce behavior for the long term.
21. Happiness is Substituting More Money for Magic Moments
Many people think they need more money to be happy and use money to acquire things in the pursuit of happiness. Happiness is an internal state of being where you realize you are enough just the way you are and you possess the ability to be happy at any time. Remember your net worth is not the source of your self worth. Regardless of how little or much money you have it is essential to separate your self esteem, self image and self worth from your worldly possessions. As you experience more trips around the sun you realize the magic moments with family, friends and even strangers are the memories which tend to provide the most happiness, pleasure and satisfaction. When we leave this world our net worth will stay behind and the magic moments we created will be remembered long after we are gone. Go create Magic Moments which you can enjoy until the end of your time.
This Great NEWS post was designed to share the remaining simple success strategies to reduce our stress and help us start enjoying life more. When we are more aware of our limiting patterns we can change our behaviors be even more happy, healthy and in harmony. We have so many things to be grateful for and when we focus even more on what is great in our lives we will attract more of that. With the simple success strategies in this Stop That and Start This Part 2 we can fulfill our desires and dreams.
What is your current Gap?
What other areas of your life have been less than stellar? Awareness of limiting beliefs or personal challenges is the first step in resolving them. Using Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) tapping is a great way to help resolve the unresolved emotional upsets that have been negatively impacting your life.
Mastery Action Plan (MAP)
Setting up a video camera during the holidays is a great way to capture and record information to provide greater awareness regarding your behaviors, mannerisms and speech patterns. Consider asking family, friends and co-workers to provide feedback regarding your most memorable and least memorable attributes. Being open and receptive to feedback is a valuable personal growth skill.
Call to Action
What comments, commitments or questions do you have regarding insights from these 21 Simple Success Suggestions?
Next week the Great NEWS blog will share: Cold and Flu Prevention Prescription Part 1